You Gotta Have Heart

Acardiac. What a cold term. It literally means, no heart. Maybe that’s why it bothers me so much. Heartless.

Acardiac twin. That’s what she is referred to now all the time. No more baby b. No more Summer’s sister. Just the acardiac twin. The heartless twin.

I think it bothers me because of what the heart means to me. Yes, its literally the lifeblood of someone but in more ways than just sustaining life. I think being called heartless is one of the most hurtful things you can be called – and that’s because in my definition of heart, it’s what makes you alive. Not a living being. But ALIVE.

The heart is the only organ in the body that is used to describe such a variety of ideas and feeling besides being an organ and a shape. And there are so many phrases that we use with regard to heart; each with a slightly different definition.

Just to name a few….
*after one's own heart
*break someone's heart
*by heart
*from the bottom of one's heart
*have a heart
*near and dear to one's heart
*wear one's heart on one's sleeve,

Here are some definitions I like…
*the center of the total personality, especially with reference to
intuition, feeling, or emotion
*the center of emotion, especially as contrasted to the head as the
center of the intellect
*capacity for sympathy; feeling; affection
*Spirit, courage, or enthusiasm
*the innermost or central part of anything
*the vital or essential part; core: the heart of the matter

That’s what heart means to me. Having heart is about having passion. Compassion. Love. Courage. Faith. Stubborn determination. It truly is the center, the very core of who we are. Our heart. It’s our enthusiasm, our emotion – where both our deepest pains and greatest joys reside. If you’ve ever had a broken heart from losing a loved one through life circumstances, death or otherwise – then you know the pain really is in your heart. It actually hurts on the left side of your chest; where the very organ that is pumping blood is located, is also the site of the emotional pain of a broken heart. It’s not just a romantic notion. Not just a theatrical, literary term – broken heart. It comes from the fact that the pain really is where your heart is located.

Working with people with special needs on a daily basis, I see what it’s like to have heart. My friends with Down syndrome have more stubborn determination than I have ever had. (I can just be plain stubborn). The parents of many of these babies have more courage and faith than I have seen elsewhere. And the entire world of special needs demonstrates more love and compassion than I have witnessed in the general population.
These families are faced with challenges that they respond to… with heart.
Individuals with special needs face their everyday circumstances… with heart.

I did a quick search of the Bible to see what it had to say about heart. There were 725 references! I didn’t read them all but got a general sense of the importance of ‘heart’ in more ways than one.

There are many references to specific people’s hearts; Pharoah, Saul, Hannah, Judas, even God’s heart, just to name a few.

It mentions the many ways our hearts are involved in feeling and action;
Hearts of desire, love in your heart, obstinate heart, hardened hearts, knowing in your heart, seeking with all your heart, taking heart, fearful hearts, the eyes of our hearts etc.

But the main principle was about where to focus your heart. What to keep your heart engaged with, in order that you, through your heart, are not led astray – into fear, discouragement, disappointment and all the other slew of emotions that comes with having regrets. It was about staying the course with knowing right versus wrong. With choosing right versus wrong. It reminds us to keep our hearts aligned with God’s purpose for our lives – to know Him, to love others.

Here are some of my favorite verses about heart….
**Men looks at outward appearance but God looks at the heart.
**Where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.
**Love the Lord your God with all your heart with all your soul with all your strength and with all your mind. (Side note – it’s interesting that when Jesus was asked what the greatest commandment was, he answered with this verse – to love God with all your heart. And to love your neighbor. I think that speaks volumes about how powerful our hearts really are.)

Life is all about heart. And not the kind that pumps blood through your body. While you need that to be considered alive, in my definition of being alive – it’s feeling alive. It’s that feeling of being on a rollercoaster (yes, even the kind I am currently on). When you laugh so hard your stomach hurts (or you wet your pants). When the pain of losing someone you love makes it hard even to breathe. It’s the adrenaline rush after completing something that takes courage – running a marathon, giving a speech, getting help when you need it, giving birth.

Being alive is feeling all of these things. And to feel them, you have to have heart. What that heart is full of is what determines your actions – it might be a heart full of compassion that drives you to help people. It might be a heart full of insatiable desire to learn – that’s what drives you to become a CEO, or continue schooling. It might be a heart full of maternal instinct which makes you want to raise a family or be a teacher. It doesn’t matter what your heart is full of as long as it is full. (Caveat - as long as it's full of life-giving traits and not deceit, jealousy etc.) Full to the point that it drives you to action. To do something. Even if it’s just the next load of laundry for your family, or giving those extra clothes to the homeless, or getting on your knees for that family member that needs help. Where your treasure is, that's where you heart is also.

I was particularly impacted by all the verses that talked about God changing, touching someone’s heart. While I don’t pretend to know why he hardened Pharaohs heart, or why he softened someone else’s heart, I like the fact that He is close enough, involved enough in our lives to touch our hearts. It’s good to know that He can change us. When we are powerless (which if we are honest, we usually are) He can change that. He can give us the courage to get help for the failing struggle with addiction. He can remove the guilt from our past. He can open our eyes to see beyond ourselves and to the needs of the world around us. He can give Summer’s heart the strength to pump for both her and baby b.

It’s important to me to have heart. To have passion. To have compassion. To feel – both the pain and the joy in life. I want to live my life with heart. I don’t know about baby b, but I think Summer has enough heart for 2. And I just can’t wait to meet her.